Chapter 45

WRITTEN IN THE STARS
45

SBANISENKOSI

I haven't been able to sleep all this while. It's past 23h00pm and I haven't even slept a wink. My mind is driving me insane, my anxiety levels are shooting up and I'm afraid. I'm praying to God that it doesn't get worse because if it does. I'm gonna be rushed to the hospital.

I don't know how I'm pregnant, what am I saying? we had sex without protecting ourselves and now there's a human being in me. I don't know how my family is going to react. I'm afraid of my dad, I know he's going to find it hard to accept it. I'm his only daughter.

I roll out of bed and turn on the lights. I grab the framed photo of Nkanyezi on the wall and sit on the bed with it.

“Nkanyezi..” I whisper glaring at his beautiful smile, those beautiful eyes that are full or undying love and affection. I heave a sigh..

“Stupid me, I couldn't even keep a man like you. I'm literally the most stupid person on this earth.” I say.

“I just hope you find someone who loves you the way you deserve to be loved. I couldn't love you that way and I'm deeply sorry for disappointing you.” I say, I hurt him so much to the extent where he had to choose himself in all of this. I place the photo back and walk out.

I head downstairs, I feel thirsty. I walk to the kitchen and grab a bottle of water. I really did a beautiful job on this house. It looks cool..

“Unable to sleep?” She startles me a bit as I turn around.

“Yeah, I just came here to drink some water. I was thirsty..” I say, she smiles and walks inside.

“Coffee?” She asks, I nod a bit.

“I always wake up around this time to pray and ask God for guidance after everything that happened with my soon to be ex husband.” She says turning on the coffee machine.

“It's been a lot.” i say sitting on the high chair.

“I have something to keep myself busy with instead of crying every night now.” She says glaring at me.

“And that is?” I ask her.

“My grandchild, my unborn grand baby.” She says, I heave a sigh. It feels so unreal that I'm pregnant.

“Never even a part of my plans.” I say, life isn't going the way I thought it would go to be honest.

“You know Sbani, we don't plan anything that happen in our life 60% of the time. They just happen and it's up to you if you take them seriously or not. I didn't plan on marrying Lincoln and being the mother of to his 2 sons. That wasn't part of my plans but because God had other plans for me. Here I am..” She says.

“You went to that club with the intention of just having fun not knowing that you'll meet Christopher.” She says, I heave a sigh rembering how wild that day was.

“That was a very unique and interesting day.” I say, I'll never forget the bathroom scene. To even think we did twice in the bathroom, yeah neh.

“Here's your coffee..” She says handing me the mug.

“Thank you ma..” I say.

“I'll accompany you to get some of your clothes tomorrow unless you need me to do some shopping for you then I don't mind.” She says.

“I'd appreciate the free shopping..” I say, she smiles and nods.

“No issue, tomorrow I'll go do some shopping for you. Because now you're pregnant, you're going to need comfy shoes as well. When I was pregnant, my mother used to make me some porridge and some herbal tea, that gave me the easiest delivery. I didn't have a hard time pushing Adrianna out, it was just a few minutes and my contractions weren't that bad.” She says clearly freaking me out, why is she talking about these stuff?

“You're freaking me out.” I say, she laughs a bit.

“You're just anxious and scared right now, as time goes by and the baby starts growing in your womb. You're going to feel that love for it and the urge to hold the baby at that moment will increase.” She says.

“Meaning I can't hide the pregnancy from my parents or Nkanyezi. I'll have to tell them one way or the other.” I say.

“But you'll do that when you're ready, you don't need to rush yourself sthandea sami.” She says. I nod..

“Do you want some scones? they're really good with the coffee.” She says, reminding me of my mother, I think I should tell my mother first before anyone else. I also cannot hide this from Christopher. He's gonna know either way..

“Yes please..” I say, she grabs the container that has scones I think and opens it. They smell so good.

“Just 3 will be fine..” I say, she nods taking out the scones and placing them on the saucer. We eat, I'm not a person that used to eat at these times but here I am, eating for not myself only but for two people. Once we're done eating, we go to sleep and it is now that I actually feel tired.

I get in bed and utter a short prayer before dozing off, this life ain't balancing. Everything smells like Christopher in here. I should've just taken the guestroom or a room that won't make my heart sink further.
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CHRISTOPHER

I don't think I'm familiar with alcohol anymore. The amount of alcohol I had yesterday is the one making me feel this way? very odd. I showered an hour back and my body must tbe the weakest thing on earth right now.

I'm having some iced coffee hoping that it will help me with this hungover. It's not easy crying over a breakup. That's what they always say and now I'm afraid but I have to agree with them.

“Are you gonna come to work today?” Nkanyiso asks, I shake my head resting my head on my hand.

“Cover in for me, I don't feel good.” I say.

“I know, you'll get better. It's just a hungover..” He says, I nod.

“I'll go to mom's house so she can make me that hungover remedy she used to make for us.” I say.

“Huh? just stay in and watch some football games. You don't need to go there..” He says looking around. I frown glaring at him.

“Why?” I ask him.

“I mean..it's just a long drive from her to mom's house so I'm only thinking of you here.” He says, bullshít..

“Well I'm going, besides I need to talk to her.” I say.

“Then call her if you need to talk brother haa, its not a big deal.” He says, why is he acting like this?

“What's going on Nkanyiso? why does it seem like you don't want me to go to mom's house?” I ask him.

“Okay why would I prevent you from going to see our mother?”  He asks..

“Nkanyiso..” I glare at him with a straight face, he sighs.

“Mom is gonna kill me for telling you this, you're putting me in a tight position.” He says.

“Just talk...”  I say.

“Okay so she called me and told me that I must not let you come to her house.” He says, why would mom say something like that?

“Because sister inlaw is there...” He says

“Sbani?” I ask him, he nods.

“She's gonna be staying with mom for some time.” He says, i nod. Seeing each other right now will just make things worse. The heartbreak and all that so I'll not go near that house as mom requested.

“I have to go, I'll see you. I also got rid of the alcohol in this house incase you want to drink and kill yourself.” He says walking to the door, I doubt I'll even have the courage to drink and kill myself