35

BURNING BLUE.
BY BELLA ROYALTY.
35.

[SNETHEMBA NGWAZI]
After feeding S'nakhokonke and burping her, I laid her down, and my mother walked in my room.

Mom: Hey baby.
Me: Hey mom.
Mom: Sabelo told me you went to the city with Snakho yesterday, I know I said at 3 months you could go to places with her but you could have asked me to babysit her for you.
Me: I know Mom, I went to see her father.
Mom: Snethemba, that's not how things are done.

Me: I know Mom but I'm glad I did, so much has happened in his life, their house burnt down, so we weren't going to find him and his family there anyway, so I went to his apartment and luckily I found him there, despite his father being laid to rest this weekend and their house burning down, he just found out that he's not even a Zwane.

She looked at me shocked.
Me: Exactly! Apparently he was switched at birth and he's meeting his biological family for the first time this weekend shortly after laying the man who raised him to rest.
Mom: That's a complete turnaround, how did your father miss that?
Me: I don't know but he got the dark entity part right, he did confirm it in not so many words that ubaba wakhe bethwele.(his father was a ritualist)
Mom: Kuningi nje ngalomfana Snethemba.(There's just a lot about this boy, Snethemba)
Me(sighs): I know Mom, but at least he didn't seem shocked by Snakho and I think he was happy, a little, I actually expected worse from him.

She nodded.
Mom: So,what is his real identity if he's not a Zwane?
Me: He said he's a Miya.
Mom: uMamncane wakho was married to the Miya clan before she got married to your father.(Your stepmother)
Me: Perhaps she might know Shaka's family.
Mom: Let me go and ask her.
Me: I just realized something yazi mah(you know mom), when I got to his apartment he was with his sister whom he introduced as Ndalo and she looked familiar.
Mom: She also has a daughter by the name of Ndalo as well.

Oh God, could it be?
Me: Didn't she say her son, Zibuko or something, died?
Mom: Snethemba! Bring S'nakhokonke!

She walked out and I took Snakho and followed her to where my father and Mamncane Nonhlanhla were.(my stepmother, Nonhlanhla)
Dad: What's wrong? Mama kaSnethemba?
Mom: Nonhlanhla, you said your son died right? Your first son?
Nonhlanhla: Nokuthula, why would you ask me about that?
Mom: Answer the question.
Nonhlanhla: Yes he died when he was 8 years old, why?
Me: And you're sure that he was your son?

She swallowed.
Nonhlanhla: What's this about?
Mom: The boy who impregnated Snethemba just found out he was switched from birth and the people who've been raising him aren't his biological parents, he is actually a Miya and he has a sister by the name of Ndalo.
Nonhlanhla(confused): So? I'm sure there's a lot of Ndalwenhle Miya's out there.

I searched for Shaka's pictures and then handed them the phone.
Me: That's Snakho's father.
Dad: Nonhlanhla? Is this not your son with Thembinkosi? Zibuko died because the Miya ancestors rejected him, could it be because he wasn't really a Miya because he had been switched at birth?

Nonhlanhla's hands were trembling, she almost fainted and Mom shouted to Aunt Khosi to bring water.

Dad: This is not the time to act shocked Nonhlanhla, tell us the damn truth!
Nonhlanhla: Impossible! He died! I left him dead! When I left the hospital he was dead!
Mom: What do you mean Nonhlanhla? You switched the babies because you thought your son was dead therefore you took another woman's child?

She started crying, I couldn't believe this woman! Who does that?
Dad: Nonhlanhla!!!
Nonhlanhla(crying): I thought he was dead! I could not return home with a dead child. My marriage was already falling apart! It depended on the child I was carrying! He wasn't breathing! I thought he was dead!
Mom(claps in disbelief): Unamanyala Nonhlanhla(You are full of shit Nonhlanhla)! Your own flesh and blood? You left him to die and went home with a stranger's child and when he started getting sick, it never occurred to you that he might have needed his real father's surname?
Nonhlanhla(crying); I know Nokuthula! I knew but where was I going to start looking for this woman that I shared a ward with? And if I found her, what was I going to say to her? I stole her child! I was under the impression that my son had died which meant she was in grief because she had lost a son!
Dad: This child didn't die on his own did he Nonhlanhla?

What does Dad mean?
Dad: I told you that you had blood on your hands, innocent blood and what did you say? You killed this child didn't you?
Nonhlanhla(pleading): Ngwazi I can explain!
Mom: Explain how you left your child to die and stole another woman's child and then killed him?
Nonhlanhla: He was in pain and he wasn't getting better! I was relieving him from his misery!
Me(shocked): What?
Mom: You deserve to be locked up!
Nonhlanhla: No, no, I can't go to jail! I will flip the story! I can't go to jail! I am heavily pregnant!

Mom: You stole a child and then killed him, Nonhlanhla! An innocent child! What kind of woman are you? What kind of mother are you? All this time you made your former in-laws and ex-husband the villains, meanwhile you're the real villain! Baba, do you see the kind of woman you've brought into your father's yard? A thief and a child murderer!

Nonhlanhla was just a crying mess, I couldn't even look at her anymore. I got up with my child and went to lock myself in my room.

I couldn't believe this at all, Nonhlanhla is Shaka's mother? Why did I never make the connection? Now that I know what I know I can see the resemblance, as far as her other children are concerned, I don't know them that much because they've never visited us here because they are Miyas and their mother was no longer a Miya.

Oh my God, this is messed up! This entire time I've always known Shaka's mother? Nonhlanhla is my stepmother and the grandmother of my child? What?

My phone rang and it was my friend, Lusanele.
Me: Anele hey.
Lusanele: Hey babes, I'm on my way, 1 minute out.
Me: Oh okay, I'll open for you.
Her: Okay.

Snakho was asleep now, I left her in bed and went to open the gate for Lusanele to drive in, she parked and got out of the car.
Lusanele(smiles): Hey mommy.
Me: Hey Godmother!

We shared a hug.
Lusanele: I got my Goddaughter something.
Me(laughs): I'm not even surprised.
Lusanele: I couldn't help it, baby girl clothes are so cute!
Me(laughs): Oh I know, trust me.

She got the biggest gift bag ever and I laughed as we walked inside my bedroom.
Lusanele(swooning): Ooh you just get prettier each day don't you?
Me(smiles): She's so adorable, can I get you anything?
Lusanele: I'm here for the tea, honey, how did it go?

Of course, this one and news? Sugar and honey.
Me: It went well, better than I had expected, he was shocked but he was okay.
Lusanele: Okay, I didn't expect that from our resident player.
Me: You'd be surprised, he's not a player anymore.
Lusanele(laughs); Girl please! Prime will always be a player!
Me: He says he's not a player anymore, says he has a girlfriend and whatnot.
Her: And you believe that? Sneh we are talking about Prime here, 70% of the girls in school know his D.

We laughed, that's true.
Me: At least he wasn't going around showing people his disability.

We laughed.
Her(laughs): Imagine!
Me: That guy is anything but disabled honey, he's the reason why I cannot be with another guy, I fear the sex might not be as fire.
Her(laughs): Oh my God, well the two of you can finally be together now.
Me: Despite having a girlfriend, friend we both know I kept rejecting the guy but kept coming back for his D***, I don't think I'm still that 'girl' to him anymore.
Her: You'd be surprised, get Ngwazi(your father) to help you out.
Me: We are currently in a crisis as it is ngikutshele.(let me tell you)
Her: What crisis now? There's always something in this Ngwazi household, y'all should have your own reality show.
Me: Girl!

I told her everything.
Her: Sneh unamanga oe! (Sneh, you are lying, ain't no way!)
Me: I wish! Nonhlanhla, my stepmother, is Shaka's biological mother.
Her: Phew! Never judge a book by its cover! She seems sweet!
Me: I know! But she's a thief and a murderer! Like who does that? I can only imagine what Mrs Zwane is currently going through, she's just lost her husband, lost her home and now she's just found out that the son she has raised from birth isn't hers and her biological son is dead?
Her: She has to press charges, Nonhlanhla stole her child and murdered it, the emotional trauma? No, your stepmother needs to pay for what she did!
Me: I doubt Dad will allow that, she's his pregnant wife.
Her: She will give birth in prison and the child will be raised outside, she has to pay!
Me: I don't see Shaka giving her a chance at all.
Her: Rightfully so! I'd hate her as well!

I exhaled.
Her: So Snakho is a Miya and not a Zwane?
Me: Yes.
Her: Yoh! Ay bandla! (Yoh, this is hectic)

She clapped her hands in disbelief.
Her: Anyway, I'd like to stalk this girl that managed to tame Prime, if that's even true for all we know he could have lied, we both know he used to like you, so maybe he said that to bruise your ego.

I laughed.
Her: He's got to have posted her or something.
Me: I wouldn't know, I'm not friends with him on social media.
Her: Neither am I.
Me: I think he blocked every girl he's ever been with.
Her: Let me check Tumelo, Sean or Lungelo's profiles and see if I won't find her.
Me: I will go and get us something to drink and snack on in the meantime.
Her: Okay babes.

I went to the kitchen and poured us something to drink and cut us some cake and returned to my room.
Me: Are you winning?
Her: She's gorgeous!
Me: Let me see!

She showed me her picture.
Me: Damn! Ntandokazi Ngema?
Her: And she's somewhat of an influencer.
Me: Let's stalk her fully.

We went on a full stalkish vibe on this girl and no doubt, she was gorgeous, effortless, I could see why Shaka is taken by her.
Her: And she's actually good at this social media stuff, look at the number of followers she has.
Me: What's this?

We clicked on the video.
Her: Wait, she's his cousin?
Me: I guess with him being a Miya, it means she's not his cousin.
Her(laughs): Why am I even surprised? Prime would fuck his own cousin or step sister if he could, he loves girls.
Me: Can't believe he was tamed by his own cousin.
Her: Do you see this girl Sneh? I bet he gets turned on by just looking at her, she is seduction in human form.
Me: I would never be able to compete with that.

She looked at me.
Her: You are the mother of his child and I remember a time when Prime actually liked you way beyond just what's between your legs.
Me: Look at her Anele.
Her: I am looking at her.
Me: I don't stand a chance, mother of his child or not.
Her: Don't underestimate yourself, he liked you at some point.
Me: And I kept rejecting him.
Her: You were trying to protect your heart babes, he was a player back then.

I sighed while scrolling through this girl's pictures.

[NDALWENHLE MIYA]
You can imagine my shock when I got a call from my mother asking me to meet her for lunch. I canceled my lunch plans with my man just to be here, whatever it is, it better be good.

She stood up as I approached the table, she looked awful, like she had been crying, is there trouble in paradise already? Being in a polygamous marriage must be emotionally exhausting, I'd never survive.

Mom: Hey baby.
Me: Hi.

We shared a hug and sat down, the waitress took our orders.
Me: Kill my curiosity already mother.
Mom: Why didn't you tell me?
Me: Tell you what?
Mom: About your brother?
Me: Oh, I didn't see any reason to tell you, I mean you did leave him to die in hospital when you saw that he wasn't breathing.
Mom: And that's what the other woman told you? She lied to you! If there's anyone who switched babies here, it's her!

I laughed, I expected this actually, I knew she'd twist the story to make herself out to be the victim.

Me: Oh mother, whoever you hired back then to erase the footage on the cameras did a lousy job, we know everything, and very soon, the police will be knocking on your door, if I were you, I'd start looking for a really good lawyer because the Zwane's and my father are coming for you.

She looked shocked.
Me: I discovered the video with the help of Lindani, as we speak Shaka has it, dad has it and so do the Zwane's.
Mom(gasps): Oh my God! They can't send me to jail! I wasn't in my right mind! Ndalo I had just given birth! I wasn't thinking straight!
Me: It seemed as if you were in your right mind mom.
Mom(crying): Ndalo you cannot let this happen to me! I am old, I am heavily pregnant! I won't be able to survive in jail! Surely there's got to be something that I can do to persuade them to not press charges against me.
Me: I don't think so yazi Mah(you know mom), in fact all of this could have been avoided had you just taken Zibuko back to his family, the same way you got someone to erase the footage at the hospital, is the same way you could have hired someone to track that woman you shared a ward with.

She wiped her tears.
Me: I am even ashamed of acknowledging you as my mother, what you did was despicable, dead or alive, he was your flesh and blood and you just left him there! You exchanged him with another child like you were exchanging a bag of rotten potatoes for one that didn't have rotten potatoes, and then you let the poor boy die when you could have done something!

Mom: And you think what I did hasn't been haunting me all these years?
Me: Clearly it hasn't been haunting you enough if you hadn't thought of confessing!
Mom: Just… give me his address, I can talk to him and—
Me: Dad doesn't want you anywhere near him, he doesn't want you anywhere near him either and neither do I, leave him alone.
Mom: He is my son!
Me: He is Mandisa Zwane's son and his father is Thembinkosi Miya, who are you again mother? Aren't you Nonhlanhla Ngwazi? Your son died years ago! Focus on finding a good lawyer as I mentioned earlier.

I took out a few notes and placed them on the table and got up and left her there.

I drove to my brother's apartment while calling dad.
Dad: Ndalwenhle.
Me: Mom knows about Shaka.
Dad: What? How?
Me: I don't know, but she does, you need to press charges.
Dad: I figured it wasn't a great time to speak about that with the Zwanes, seeing that they are grieving.
Me: I see, I'm on my way to see Shaka right now, if she was able to find out about him, it'll only be a matter of time till she finds his address.
Dad: Okay baby, let me speak to the elders.
Me: Okay bye.

I dropped the call and as I drove to Shaka's apartment I couldn't help but think that I've seen Shaka's baby mama before somewhere and then it hit me!

About 30 minutes later I arrived.
Shaka(smiles): Hey sis.
Me: Hey bhuti(brother), bad time?
Shala: No, please come in.

We walked inside, Ntando was on the couch watching TV.
Me(smiles): Hey pretty girl from Joburg..
Ntando(smiles): Hey doc.
Me: Are you guys okay?
Shaka: We are good, but you're not.
Me(sighs): The woman who gave birth to you knows about you.
Shaka: Oh, how?
Me: Uhm… so I thought your babymama looked familiar.

I said clearing my throat while looking at Ntando who didn't seem at all interested in whatever Shaka and I were talking about.
Shaka: What about her?
Me: I think her mother is one of mom's sister wives.
Shaka: Is your mother's husband a healer and a business man?
Me: Yes he is.
Shaka: He's a Ngwazi?
Me: Yes.
Shaka: F***!
Me: So she must have told them who her babydaddy is and maybe showed them a picture and they put two and two together since you told her everything yesterday which I frowned upon.

He cleared his throat.

[SHAKA PRIME ZWANE]
I did not see this coming at all, the woman who gave birth to me is married to Snethemba's father? It is indeed a small world and it's only a matter of time till we all meet anyway.

My phone rang as I was sorting out Peach's pills since we had just finished having dinner, the phone was next to her.
Me: Can you get that for me babe.
Peach: It's your babymama.
Me: Please answer it.
Peach: Cela ungangijwayeli kabi Shaka.(Please don't get over familiar with me, Shaka)

I bit my lip, because I'm already threading on thin ice, I decided to let that go, even though I didn't like the way she spoke to me.

Me: Please take your pills.
Peach: Thank you.

She took her pills and I answered the call and placed it on loudspeaker.
Me: Snethemba.
Snethemba: Hey Shaka, I hope this isn't a bad time?
Me: Is this related to the baby? If it's not, then it is a bad time.
Snethemba: Oh, uhm… I don't know if you're aware, but turns out one of my father's wives is your biological mother.
Me: I have just been informed.
Snethemba: Oh, she wants your number and address.
Me: Tell her, her son died 23 years ago, my mother is Mandisa Zwane.

I dropped the call and exhaled.
Me: I don't like the way you've just spoken to me Peach.
Peach: I'm sorry.

Me: I know this is difficult for you, finding out that I have a child with someone else, I was just as shocked as well baby and I'm still trying to accept it and come to terms with it, I need you by my side, I need your support, I know I'm asking too much from you sthandwa sami, but I need you.

Peach: Did you love her?
Me(shocked): What?
Peach: Did you love her?
Me: I've never loved anyone else besides you, Peach, she was like the other girls I slept with, the condom broke.

She laughed a little, seems like I'm getting the mean version of her, by the time this conversation ends, she would have killed me with her brutality, but nonetheless, I'd rather that than have the quiet Peach.

Peach: The condom broke? Is that what you told her? You and I have never used protection before but I've been through your stuff, you always carry condoms with you and they are not the usual ones mainly because you have accessories, your type of condoms are made to not break at all, so let's try this again, Did you love her? You must have, because you thought by trapping her with a child she'd stay and the two of you would be tied together forever by a child, but then she disappeared.

F*****!!

Peach: So let's try this again baby, this time we tell nothing but the truth because believe me, if you lie to me, best believe your babymama will spill the tea unprovoked, that's how we women operate, she will be bragging to me for being the first for you in everything and like you, I hate being made a fool, I need to be ready at all times.

Me: I lied.
Peach: Be specific.

Me: About you being the first and only girl I've ever loved, she was the first, but she didn't love me back, but I did and I was willing to change for her if she gave me a chance, I saw her in my future, I thought she was worth it, that was before I met you.

Peach: That was before she disappeared.

Me: Don't put it like that, now you're making it sound like I settled for you because she got away and that's not the truth, I probably would have cheated on her with you because you are my true love, you are my soulmate.

Peach: That's comforting.
Me: I mean it Peach.
Peach: Oh I believe you baby.

She doesn't.

Peach: Carry on.
Me: Long story short, I'm the one who took her virginity, but she still didn't want me, not in that way anyway, she said she was protecting her heart from the campus's biggest player, I told her I loved her she said I loved what's in between her legs which wasn't true, the way I loved her I agree I went about it the wrong way.

Peach: You trapped her with a child and she's under the impression that you didn't have your usual condoms so you used the cheap ones which tore obviously.

Me: I'm not proud of it, when she disappeared I figured my plan hadn't worked, so I moved on from her, I accepted that she didn't love me and moved on.
Peach: Yey you must have really loved her though, to go as far as trapping her with a child Shaka? Bringing a child into the world is a huge step!
Me: I don't love her anymore, I love you I swear.

Peach: I don't doubt that you love me Shaka, I know you love me, you've proven that a lot of times, I don't doubt it at all, but at the same time, I don't doubt that you also haven't gotten over your first crush, your first love and now the mother of your child, earlier you said, you understand that this might be difficult for me, let me tell you something, it wasn't difficult for me earlier, but now? Oh you bet it's difficult Shaka! I'm sure you can understand, you do understand why right?

I swallowed.
Me: You've got nothing to worry about I swear Peach.
Peach(laughs): I have every reason to worry Shaka, I thought I was the special one, the one who retired your ass from the game, I thought I was the special girl who tripped you and made you fall in love for the first time, and now I find out that no, Peach you aren't that special, there was someone before you, someone Shaka was ready to change for, someone Shaka saw in his future as his wife and the mother of his children.

She faked a smile.
Peach: What a confidence booster.
Me: Baby, please, please don't do this.
Peach: I haven't done anything baby, so like if she were to say, 'Shaka, I'm ready to give you a chance now, we can be a family, you, me and our daughter' what would you say?

Me: I love you.
Peach: You're not fu**** answering my question!

She raised her voice.
Me: I'd tell her that ship has sailed and she should have given me a chance when I was begging for it, now I've found someone, someone who I truly love and can't see my life without, someone I'd do anything to keep.
Peach; Including killing for her and jumping over the fire and getting into a burning car, yeah yeah we get it Shaka, I feel really honored.
Me: I mean it Peach.
Peach: Siyakubongela.(congratulations)

I looked at her for a while.
Me: Ntando I love you and only you, Snethemba is my past, you are my present and future.
Peach: Okay.
Me: Baby please.
Peach: I said okay.
Me: But what does that mean?
Peach: It means okay, can I switch on the TV now?
Me: No.

She exhaled.
Peach: Okay then, what more do you want to say to me? Or rather what more do you want me to say to you?
Me: Tell me, despite what I've just told you about my past, you still believe in our love, in what we have, there's no reason for you to worry about Snethemba.
Peach: Do you remember that you installed cameras in this apartment? They provide audio as well, were you aware of that?

Oh my God!
Peach: And since you're such a gone boy, gaining access to your laptop and security feed wasn't that hard, so I heard you and your babymama reminiscing about your time together, discussing your meat, and her expressing just how difficult it's been sleeping with her nonexistent boyfriend because she was afraid it wouldn't be as glorious as being with you.

Me: Baby—
Peach: That conversation wasn't necessary, it was distasteful Shaka.
Me: Baby I know, I don't know what got over me, usually I wouldn't let any girl be that close and comfortable around me.
Peach: Right.
Me: Baby…

Peach: Boy, If you call me that one more time I swear I'm going to throw this remote on your face! I didn't want to talk about this, I was done with the conversation izolo but nope you just had to force me to talk about it and now my insecurities are through the roof, my trust issues are spiking, umuntu shuthi ukuphumula uyokuthola eCebolethu ngempela! (I guess I will the only time I'll find real peace is when I'm dead and lying at the mortuary)

I sighed and looked down, hiding my face in my hands.
Me: I won't be a part of the baby's life then.
Peach: And that's supposed to make me happy right? Robbing that little girl a chance to have a relationship with her father? I'm supposed to be happy that I robbed you of that chance as well? To be a father to your child? Does that even make any sense to you?

Me: Ntando, ufunani ke(What is it that you want then?)Because I'm telling you Snethemba won't be a problem, I don't love her anymore, I'm telling you I won't have a relationship with my child, but still you don't seem happy, what should I do then huh? Kill snethemba and bring Snakho here so that we will raise her as ours? No, ngitshele ukuthi ufunani(Tell me what you want) and I will do it!

I snapped.
Me: Ufunani Ntando?(What is it that you want Ntando)Tell me what is it that you want? Tell me because right now you're driving me crazy! I get how you must feel truly I do, and I'm sorry for putting you in this position, but I am not the guy I was a year ago, I am with you now and I love you and I would do absolutely anything to make you happy and keep you as my girlfriend, I didn't settle for you just because Snethemba disappeared! I fell inlove with you from the moment I saw you, I cannot explain what I felt when I first laid my eyes on you, but it was something I had never, do you understand me when I say that it was something I had never felt for anyone before? I thought what I felt for Snethemba was love but when I met you? I knew what I felt for Snethemba was nothing compared to what I felt for you! Her sudden reappearance will not change that do you hear me? No, look at me when I'm talking to you.

She looked at me.
Me: It will not change the way I feel for you, Ntando you are everything I want in a woman, I haven't looked at any girl ever since you and I became official, I doubt I'd even get turned on by another girl, that's just how much power you hold over me, I would not risk what we have because of something from the past, so tell me right now what do you want me to do in order for you to not feel the way you do right now? I promise you, I will do anything Sthandwa sami(my love), I am truly not the man I used to be a year ago, I was young back then, I made some mistakes, I thought I was in love but I wasn't, I would never hurt you Ntando, not intentionally, I respect you way too much, I respect and value what we have, and I'd do anything to keep what we have, I just need you to trust me.

Not a single tear? Something happened to Peach that day, I don't even think my heartfelt and sincere words landed anyway on her, this is not my girl.

Peach: Nice speech, very touching.

I ran my hands on my face, that girl should have remained in whatever hole she was hiding at with my child for the past year and months, because of her, my connection with Peach is shaky.