Deadly obsession ,Chapter 14
ZIBUSISOI've been trying to work up the courage to tell Suku how I feel, but I haven't been able to do it.Then she came to me and told me I should listen to my father and all that other nonsense. I couldn't even listen to what she was saying.
I can't believe my father went on and asked Suku to try to convince me to agree to getting married.
After finishing my rounds for the day, I get my things and leave the hospital. I make my way home, my mind still racing. When I arrive, I find my mother and Suku busy in the kitchen. I greet them both, my eyes lingering on Suku, who does not look at me.
I head upstairs to change into more comfortable clothes. I search the house for my father.
I find my father in the garden, and I walk over to him and greet him. He returns my greeting, and I take a deep breath before speaking.
Me"Why did you do that, father?" I ask, my voice cracking.
Him:"Do what?" he asks, feigning ignorance.
Me:"Why did you ask Suku to convince me to agree to agree to your stupid marriage?" I say, trying to keep my tone even. "It's not going to happen, and you know that."
My father chuckles, a smug look on his face.
Him: "I had to ask her because she is your friend," my father says, still smiling. "I thought maybe she could talk some sense into you."
I look at him, incredulous.
Me: "Sense?" I ask, my voice rising. "There is no sense in this! I am not getting married to someone I don't even know!"
My father sighs, his expression turning serious. Him:"You don't understand," he says, his voice low. "This marriage is for the good of our family. It is an arranged marriage, and you must honor it."
Me:"I'm sorry to disappoint you, father," I say, my voice firm. "But I'm not going to honor this arrangement. I'm not like my brothers, who let you control them and made them marry the women you chose for them."
My father looks at me, his expression darkening.
Him: "You are not in a position to make demands of me," he says, his voice low and threatening. "You will do as I say, and you will marry the woman I have chosen for you."
Me:"No," I say, my voice rising in defiance. "I will not marry the woman you have chosen for me. I will marry when I am ready, and I will marry someone I love and want to make my wife."
My father's face turns red with anger.
Him: "You will do as I say!" he bellows, his voice echoing through the garden. "Or you will be disowned and cast out from the family. You will be nothing to me, and you will not receive any of my inheritance."
I am shocked by his threat, but I stand my ground.
Me: "Well do as you wish father,I don't need your inheritance anyway ,I have my own money I worked hard for.I don't need anything from you dad.I'm not marrying that girl of yours maybe you should marry her yourself "I say he raises his hand to slap me but he stops it midway
He looks at me, his face full of rage. I am challenging him, and I know it. But I do not back down, and I do not cower before him. I hold his gaze, and I do not flinch.
Me:"Why did you stop?" I ask again, my voice strong and unwavering. "Go ahead, hit me. See what happens."
My father's eyes narrow, and I can see that he is considering it. But then, he lowers his hand, and he turns on his heel and walks away, leaving me alone in the garden. I stand there, trembling, and try to catch my breath. I feel like I have just won a great battle, but I know that the war is not over.
*****************************************
After dinner my parents went their room.I'm left with Suku I help her with the dishes there's silence in the room.
Me"Suku," I say but she still doesn't respond. I know she must be able to hear me, so I call her by her clan name. "MaZwide!"
That gets her attention. She turns to me, and I see a smile playing on her lips.
Suku:"Yes?" she asks, her voice gentle.
Me:"I'm sorry for snapping at you earlier," I say again, feeling the need to be clear. "I just got frustrated, and I shouldn't have taken it out on you. You were just doing what you were asked to do."
She looks up at me, her eyes filled with understanding.
Suku:"It's okay, I understand," she says. "But what are you going to do now? Are you going to do it?"
I shake my head.
Me:"I can't do that," I say.
Suku:"But why?" she asks again, still seeming surprised by my words. "You could find love with someone else, someone you've been set up with?"
Me:"Because I love you," I say , my voice strong and sure. "I know it's crazy, and it probably doesn't make sense to you. But I can't help it. I love you, Suku."
She looks at me, her eyes wide and her mouth slightly open.
Suku:"But... we're friends," she says, her voice faltering. " I don't know what to say to this."
Him"I know it's a lot to take in," I say, trying to be understanding. "But I need you to know how I feel. I don't want to hide it from you anymore. I just want to be honest with you."
She looks at me, her expression unreadable. Suku:"But we're friends," she repeats, as if she's trying to convince herself as much as me. "What would this mean for our friendship? I don't want to lose you as a friend."
I take a deep breath, knowing that this is the moment of truth.
Me:"I don't want to lose you as a friend either," I say, my voice steady. "But I think we could be more than friends. We have so much in common, and we understand each other in a way that no one else does. I don't want to lose that, But I also don't want to keep pretending that I don't feel more than friendship for you," I say, my heart pounding in my chest. "It's not fair to either of us. And I think there's a chance we could be really happy together."
Suku is silent for a long moment, and I hold my breath, waiting for her response. Finally, she speaks.
Suku: "I don't know what to say," she says, sounding confused and a bit overwhelmed. "I just... I need some time to think about this."
Me:"Of course," I say, not wanting to push her too hard. "Take all the time you need. I'm not going anywhere."
Suku looks at me, her expression softening a bit.
Suku:"Thank you," she says, a small smile playing on her lips. "I just need to sort out my thoughts. I promise I'll let you know what I decide."
I nod, feeling a sense of relief that she's not rejecting me outright."Take all the time you need," I say again.
I watch as Suku walks away, feeling a strange mix of emotions. I'm relieved that she's not pushing me away, but I'm also nervous about what she'll decide. Will she want to be more than friends? Or will she choose to keep things the way they are.....
*******AFTER A COUPLE OF DAYS********
Today is Human Rights Day, I'm not working today, so I have some free time. I decide to go visit my sister, Noma. This one is taking my Zamo away from me these days.
I head to the mall to grab a few things before I drive to my sister's apartment. When I arrive, I park my car and get out, carrying the plastic bags full of groceries. I knock on the door, and Zamo opens it, greeting me with a big smile.
Zamo:"Uncle Zibusiso!" she says, throwing her arms around my legs. I smile down at her, enjoying the way she looks up at me with her bright, innocent eyes.
She lets me in, and I walk to the table and put the plastic bags down. I turn to her and pick her up.
I ask her,
Me: "How are you, little champ?"
Zamo:"I'm good, Uncle," she replies. "How are you?"
Me:"I'm not good," I say, making a silly face and sticking out my bottom lip. "I'm mad at you. ypu nolonger love me ever since you visited Aunt Noma "
She giggles, and says,
Zamo:"That's not true, Uncle! You know I love you and you're my favorite."
I smile at her, feeling the tension lift.
Me:"You're my favorite, too," I say, hugging her tight.
She beams up at me, and I feel my heart swell with love for this little girl.
Me:"Where is Aunt Noma?" I ask.
Zamo:"She's bathing," Zamo replies. "She'll be down soon."
We take the ice cream out of the freezer and get bowls and spoons ready. Then we settle down on the couch to watch cartoons while we wait for Noma to come downstairs. Zamo snuggles up to me, and I wrap my arm around her. We watch TV together, eating ice cream and laughing at the silly cartoons.
Finally, Noma came downstairs and joined us, Zamo took my phone and went to the other room to play games, leaving me and Noma alone.
Noma:"Why did you come alone?" Noma asks. "Where is Suku?"
Me:"Well, I think I messed up," I say, sounding a bit dejected. "I confessed my love to her."
Noma:"You did?" Noma asks, her face lighting up. "Then you did great, brother!"
Me:"But she's been avoiding me ever since"
Me:"But she's been avoiding me ever since," I say, my voice heavy with disappointment. "I don't know what to do."
Noma gives me a sympathetic look.
Noma:"Don't worry too much," she says. "Give her some time to process what you said. She might just need a bit of space to think about it."
Me:"But what if she doesn't feel the same way?" I ask, my fear of rejection starting to show.
Noma:"That's a risk you have to take when you open up to someone," Noma says gently."But if you don't take the risk," Noma continues, "you'll never know what might have been. And that might be worse than getting rejected."
Me:"You're right," I say, feeling a bit more optimistic. "I'll just have to be patient and give her the space she needs. I just hope she doesn't take too long to come around."
Noma:"Just be there for her, and be yourself," Noma advises. "That's the best way to show her that you're serious about your feelings."
I nod, taking in her words this one and my mother are the best when comes to advices.
We continue chatting, and I tell her about the fight I had with my father, letting it all spill out. I tell her everything, and she listens intently. When I'm done, she starts laughing, because she knows my father well and understands how stubborn he can be.
I continue, telling her about our investigation into Suku's case. Nomathemba knows me better than anyone else, and I know her just as well.We tell each other everything.
...
I drive back to my house and park in the garage, I walk inside, I find my parents watching TV. I join them on the couch.
Dad:" I hear that you have a woman in your life?"
Me:"You heard right, Baba," I say, feeling a surge of confidence.
Dad:"Who is she?" he asks, his voice full of curiosity. "And why haven't we met her yet? We've been back for a while now."
Me:"Her name is Suku," I say, my heart swelling with love as I say her name. " I wanted to be sure about my feelings for her before I introduce her as my girlfriend . But now I know for sure that I love her."
Dad: "That young girl?the one you stay with here?he asks I nod
Me:"Yes Baba she is the young woman I love"I say
Dad:"That's nonsense ,that girl is young for you"he says
Me:"And what's wrong with that?I love her and she is the one I want"I say
Dad:"Never Zibusiso I don't approve that"he says
Me:"I don't need your approval, do I?" I ask, my voice firm but not confrontational. "This is my life, and this is the woman I love. I don't need your blessing to be with her."
My father's eyes narrow, and I can see the anger building inside him.
Dad:"You are making a mistake," he says, his voice low and dangerous. "That girl is not right for you. She's too young, and she's not from a good family you can tell ,who lets their daughter to go live with a boy?she is not taught well.. You're better off without her."
Me:"I don't care if I know her or her family," I say, my voice rising. "I'm not going to let you choose who I marry. I love Suku, and that's all that matters to me."
Dad:"I don't give a damn what you want," he says, his voice rising to match mine. "You will marry the girl I choose for you. She's well-educated and comes from a good family. She's a pure girl, and she'll make a good wife for you."
Me"No," I say again, my voice strong and unyielding. "I won't marry a woman I don't love, no matter what you say. If I marry I'll marry Suku, because she's the woman I want to spend my life with. I don't care about her family or her background or whatever. I love her for who she is, not for what she can give me."
My father looks at me, his eyes blazing with fury. He opens his mouth to speak, but before he can get a word out, I cut him off.
Me:"And that's final," I say, my voice leaving no room for argument. "I'm not going to change my mind, no matter what you say or do. I love Suku."
My father stares at me, his expression hardening. Then, without another word, he gets and storms out of the room. I also get up and leave my mother alone.
.....
.......
I walk past Suku's room, and I hear the sound of quiet sobs coming from inside. I pause, then turn back and slowly open the door.
Suku is curled up on the floor next to her bed, her shoulders shaking as she cries. I walk over to her and gently touch her shoulder. She looks up at me, her eyes red and puffy from crying. I kneel down next to her and wrap my arms around her, holding her close.
She clings to me, her body shaking as she sobs into my shoulder. I let her cry, knowing that she needs to get it all out. After a few minutes, her sobs start to subside, and she pulls away from me, wiping her eyes.
"Thank you," she says, her voice hoarse from crying.
Zibusiso looks at Suku with concern.
Me: "What's wrong?" he asks gently.
Suku"I heard everything your father said downstairs," Suku says, her voice cracking. "He's right - you can't be with a girl like me. I'm not good enough for you."
my heart sinks as i hear these words. I reache out and take Suku's hand.
Me: "Don't say that," he says, his voice firm but kind. "You're an amazing person, and you're more than good enough for me.
Suku:"No Zibusiso,We can't be together," she says, "I'm too young for you, and you're too old for me. Plus, I'm not pure like your father said. I'm not the kind of woman who could make you happy."
I feel my heart break as i hear these words.
Me:"That's not true," he says, his voice firm. "Your age doesn't matter to me. And your purity doesn't matter either. I love you for who you are, not for what you are or aren't.
Suku:"But what about your father?" Suku asks, looking worried. "He'll never accept me. He'll never approve of our relationship."
Me:"I don't care what my father thinks," I say my voice full of conviction. "He can't control my life. I'm an adult, and I can make my own decisions. And I've decided that I want to be with you. If my father can't accept that, that's his problem, not ours."
Suku looks at him, and shakes her head, her eyes filling with tears.
Suku :"I don't want to be the reason for a fight between you and your father," she says. "Maybe it's better if we just stay friends. I don't want to cause any problems for you."
i looks at her, my heart breaking at the thought of losing her.
Me:"I can't just be friends with you," he says, his voice urgent. "I love you, and I want to be with you. My father can't force me to marry someone else. I'll never agree.
Suku"But what if he disowns you?" Suku asks, her voice quivering. "What if he kicks you out of the family, and you lose everything?"
Me:"I don't care about that," I say my voice strong and clear. "My family is important to me, but not as important as you are. I'd rather lose them than lose you. I'm willing to make any sacrifice to be with you."
Suku looks at him, her eyes wide with surprise. She's never heard anyone say anything like that to her before.She gets up and goes to the door
Suku:"That is not happening we cant be together Zibusiso please now can I sleep?"
I walk to the door and pause, looking at Suku one last time. I lean down and kiss her forehead, then turn and walk out the door. I walk to my room, my heart heavy with sadness....
to be continued …
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