My heart's desire

My heart's desire

Chapter 42

Jade

*I fucken get closer . Seriously the fuck is wrong with me ?*

Dante : You're not close enough . I want you close to my face . Our faces must be a inch apart . I want our breathing patterns to equal .

*He's saying all of this staring deep into my eyes.*

Jade : Um , well could you.please remove the lenses.

*They're so not him . They're making him look like an angry, cute bear.*

Dante : Get closer.

Jade : Fine , fine, geez.

*I get closer and bring my face an inch away from his. I feel him shift a little, making way for me . I attempt to get inside when he stops me . Really?*

Dante : Lock the door.

*I roll my eyes, and he chuckles as I go lock the door. I'm still fuck scares of what he'll do to me though . I get back inside and he makes way for me . My eye wonders for a second and the window is open I will get a chance to escape through it.*

Dante : Are we pregnant ?

*I pause for a little maybe I didn't hear that correctly.*

Jade : Pardon me?

Dante : Are we pregnant ?

*The fuck is wrong with guy . Seriously why did God have to create man ? How the hell are we supposed to be pregnant ? Maybe he has eggs deep inside him that I don't know of because what?*

Jade : That's impossible.

*There's a change in his face . He looks confused all of a sudden*

Dante : But you said...

Jade : What did I say ?

Dante : Something to do with hormones.

Jade : And who did I say has hormones, maybe ?

Dante : You , you said it's your hormones, so I thought , maybe .

*He looks everywhere else but my eyes. I breathe a little .*

Jade : So out of everything that I said . That is the only thing you came out with? The freaking hormones?

*I say with a snapping voice . I can feel the anger brewing inside of me . He's holding me down. I can't stand up and face him .*

Jade : Let me go . Stop holding me down!

Dante : Calm down , don't shout. I was just asking .

*I breathe in and out while counting to ten backward slowly. As soon as I'm all calm, I look back into his eyes, waiting for him to start talking .*

Dante : um well are we ?

Jade : What ? What are we?

Dante : You know pregnant?

Jade : I told you that's impossible geez I'm the pregnant one you just happened to be a sperm giver how the fuck would you get pregnant ? What's wrong with you?

*His face brightens up, and his eyes sparkle almost as bright as his smile . Stupid butterflies . I thought he wouldn't want the baby. I'm still a single mom, though . I release a heavy breathe dropping my head with my smile looking everywhere, but to him.*

Jade : It's no biggie. I've already drawn up a co parenting contract.

Dante: What?

*He forces my face to look at him . His sparkly eyes replaced with something, and I'm not sure what . Is that worry or confusion?*

Jade : We're not together anymore.

Dante : Who said that ?

Jade : Seriously?

Dante : Okay, fine, but I still want to explain . It's not what you think it's never been . You're just not willing to listen to me .

Jade :You must think that im stupid, huh? You must think that I am a fool ? Do you think I'm new to this ? I'm never gonna let you close to me . Even though you mean the most to me. Because clearly, every time I open up ,it hurts .

Dante : Just wait before you say anything. It's not what you think . It's a mission that I'm working on with this agency . She happened to be married to my late best friend from the military Leon . I promised Leon to take care of her, and because of that promise, she had some incriminating evidence that could destroy many lives . I tried to let her down easy, but she threatened me with those copies, and the only way to get free from her is by getting those copies.

Jade : Why didn't you tell me all this before? I could've understood you . You could've explained, and I would've prevented seeing you in here.

Dante : Oh ,you're still paying for that .

Jade : I feel like you don't trust me . I let you in ,and you broke my trust.

*I slowly get off the bed with tears streaming down my face. Maybe this is for the best . He's showing me that he's never trusted me enough to tell me this until now . What else could he be hiding from me until when ?*

Jade : Baby, we don't stand a chance . It's sad but uts true . I know you think I'm probably cold . But I'm just protecting my own sanity. Once you learn to trust me fully and allow me in . There's no Jante in us. I'm sorry for trying to kill you .

*I quickly unlock the door and close it, standing behind it. My tears are blinding my eyes. I see blurry. Maybe this is for the best, but does it have to hurt so bad?*