CHAPTER 4

YIKHOKONKE
We just came back from the date with Stranger. I don't know if I should call it a date or what? It was nice being with him , he's so funny and handsome. He also told me about his family. He has a sister, mother and father apparently his brother died young. He didn't get into details how he died and I didn't want to ask any further, I just assumed it was natural death.
We are now standing outside his car. He has come to drop me off.
Nkosana: I had so much fun with you.
Me: Me too.
Nkosana: So what do you say? Would you like me to take you to another date?
Me: Date? Is that what this was?
Nkosana: Yes, to me it was.
Me: Okay but only if I get to pick where we're going to eat next time.
Nkosana: What's wrong with where we were at?
Me: Everything.
He laughs.
Nkosana: Whatever you want madam.
I giggle.
Konke: I have to go now. Bye.
He hugs me. Oh he smells so good. He breaks the hug and clears his throat.
Nkosana: I'm sorry, I got carried away.
Konke: No problem. Bye now.
Nkosana: Bye .
I walk towards the house.
Nkosana: I'll call you.
Konke: I'm sure you will.
I love me a chalant man. No guys let me not get over myself, it was just a date. One date , it doesn't mean anything right?Or does it? You know what nevermind.
I get inside our yard and see two cars parked outside. Mnqobi's car and some other car I've never seen in my life. I get inside and hear people talking and laughing at the sitting room. I get in and see Mnqobi and Iba with Newton, Thando and some other girl .
Me: Hi family.
Them: Hello.
I sit down and they all look at me.
Iba: Where have you been? People have been waiting for you.
Me: People?
Thando: Yes , us.
Me: Why?
Thando: We just wanted to tell you the decision we have taken.
Now I feel bad. I made people wait because of a man? What kind of human being am I?
Me: You didn't have to wait for me. You could have told Iba to tell me.
Mnqobi: Ayi wee guys some of us are tired okay? Let's just get this over and done with.
Thando: Guys , I love your house and I loved your vibe and the way you welcomed us yesterday and I've been thinking a lot about this….
Why is she acting like we are on Idols season finale. Just say what you want to say so we know what happens next.
Thando: I'm sorry you guys but I'm gonna have to live with you from tomorrow.
She squeals. We all look at her and she looks at us as if she's expecting us to be excited or something. I mean we are happy but it looks like she's expected all of us to jump up and down.
Me: Yayyy!
Thando giggles. Is she always like this? If I didn't know better I'd say she's 6.
Newt: Ah well first of all Konke since you were not here when I introduced my the person I'm with. This is my girlfriend Siziwe. She will also be living with us. Yes I have decided to stay here. She will share the room with me.
See good , straight to the point.
Mnqobi: Hmm ayi. Wuuh wiih!
Everyone turns and looks at him.
Me: Yini inkinga yakho wena?(What is your problem?)
Mnqobi: Nothing.
He looks at Newton's girlfriend and she looks down.
Me: Hi Siziwe. Welcome honey.
Ziwe: Thank you.
She has the softest voice I've ever heard. Now that I'm taking a good look at her she looks young. She literally looks like a teenager. Her face is so small and innocent. She's dark skinned, let me just say this dark skinned girls are hot. If I was a man my girlfriend would be dark skinned.
After talking for a while ,they leave. Thando is moving in tomorrow and Newton and Ziwe are moving in Saturday. Mnqobi and Ziwe gave me weird vibes. I don't know how to explain it, it's like they know each other maybe they have slept together. Mnqobi has been bringing all kinds of women here so maybe she's one of them. Who cares anyway , they are both adults , let me go and sleep.
YIKHOKONKE
A cold wind blows while I'm sleeping. I fix the blanket and turn the other side. It blows even harder. I don't understand how because I'm sure I closed the window. I get up and see Sizwe standing near the bed staring at me. The wind immediately stops.
Me: Sizwe , what are you doing? It's cold . Get in bed.
He doesn't say anything and gets in bed. We cuddle. He's so cold .
Me: You've been standing in the cold for so long , you're so cold . You're going to catch flu you know?
Sizwe: I won't .
We cuddle in quiet for some time.
Me: You always leave me.
Sizwe: I didn't leave you. You chased me away.
Me: I was just unsure about us.
Sizwe: How about now?
Me: I'm still not sure. How will I be sure about you when every chance you get you leave me Sizwe?
Sizwe: You want me to stay?
I turn and look at him. I suddenly feel angry at him.
Me: No. Infact leave.
Sizwe: Hawu.
Me: Yes , leave Sizwe and never come back!
He looks at me with what I would like to think is a disappointed face.
Me: I said leave! Get the hell out of my room! Now!
He disappears into thin air. I cover myself with the blanket and sleep……
I wake up sweating and panting as always. Why am I dreaming about Sizwe all of the sudden? What's confusing is that in these dreams it's like I don't know that he is dead. Which part of my unhealed self is that? I take my phone and look at the time, it's 3:33. What an odd time to wake up to. There's a thunderstorm outside. I'm scared of the thunderstorm or lightning.
I try to sleep and I feel like someone is watching me, I quickly get up and run to Iba's room. I get in and she's not here. Where could she be? I go to Mnqobi's room. I knock and he opens after some time. I throw myself in his arms and cry.
Mnqobi: Ayibo queen what is it?
Me: I saw him again, I saw him.
He pulls me inside and close the door behind him.
Mnqobi: Eish Konke mfethu.
Me: He is haunting me Mnqobi. He is haunting me. You have to help me. Help me please.
Mnqobi: queen please calm down.
Me: He's in my room.
Mnqobi: What?
Me: He's in my room, I felt him looking at me. He's there.
He holds me tightly.
Mnqobi: I'm sorry queen. This is all my fault. I'm so sorry.
Me: Help me.
I cry in his chest because honestly I don't get why everything that's happening to me is happening. I thought I cleansed the spirit of this guy and now he is back? Will I ever find peace?

IBANATHI
My alarm rings and I quickly switch it off. I am in my man's chest. Yesterday when everyone went to bed he called and said he is coming to fetch me. I packed my small bag and told him to hurry. I don't know about everyone else but when my man asks me to jump , I ask how high. Instead of going to his house we went to a hotel and I don't understand why. I get up and he holds me.
Thabo: Uyaphi?(Where are you going?)
He asks with his eyes closed.
Iba: Ndiyohlamba sthandwa sami.( I'm going to bath my love.)
He opens his eyes and looks at me. Thabo hates it when I speak English. Well he hated it before but now he understands that I grew up speaking English more than Xhosa and I hardly know Xhosa.
Thabo: No stay for a while.
Iba: I'll be late for work babe.
Thabo: Just five minutes.
Iba: Okay fine.
I rest my head in his chest and he kisses my head.
Iba: Babe?
Thabo: Hmm.
Iba: Why are we at a hotel?
Thabo: Kmele ngabe sikuphi kanti bakithi?(Where are we supposed to be?)
Iba: Your house we always go there.
Thabo: Ngicela sbuye skhulume ngalento.(Let's not talk about this now .)
I'm being tested!
Iba: Why?
Thabo: We haven't even fully woken up.
Iba: Well I have and I want to know why we are at a hotel instead of your house.
Thabo: Musa ukuthetha phela mama.( Don't shout babe.)
I sit up and look at him.
Iba: So?
He sits too and leans on the headboard.
Thabo: It's because my mother visited me.
Iba: So what's the problem? Your mother knows me.
Thabo: I didn't want her to hear us doing our thing babe. Imagine you screaming with her inside the house. Ukungahloniphi nje lokho .( That's disrespectful.)
Iba: You're right. I'm sorry. After my shift I'll go and see her.
Thabo: No don't !
Iba: Ayibo ngoba?(Why)
Thabo: She is leaving now. After dropping you off at work I'm taking her home.
Iba: Why is she leaving so early? That's unlike her, usually she stays for the whole week.
Thabo: She came alone yesterday without dad. She said she just missed me so much and wanted to quickly see me. She wanted to leave yesterday but I stopped her.
He fakes a laugh.
Iba: Oh , oh if you say so. Send my regards to her.
Thabo: Will do.
He kisses me and I get on top of him.
Iba': You want me to go again?
Thabo: I want you to ride it like your life depends on it.
Iba: I'm joking babe. I have to get ready for work.
Thabo: Ahh!
I get off him. I really need to shower before I become late for work. This hotel is very far from the hospital.

MNQOBI
I wake up and Konke is not in bed. She slept here yesterday. Has she gone to work already? I hear someone flushing the toilet, Konke appears from the bathroom door. I look at her .
Konke: Morning pee.I'm sorry if I woke you up with the toilet.
Mnqobi: No you didn't . I was already awake. How are you?
She huffs a sigh and sits at the edge of the bed.
Konke: I'm fine.
I get off bed and sit next to her.
Mnqobi: Do you want to talk about it?
She nods.
Mnqobi: What happened?
Konke: I dreamt about him again.
Mnqobi: Did he attack you?
Konke: That's the thing, he didn't . He's always calm . It's like we're dating or we have history.
Mnqobi: You slept with him?
Konke: What? No! Uyasangana wena.( You're crazy.)
Mnqobi: Sorry. Phela they say it's bad luck to have sex in your dreams , especially with a dead person.
Konke: That's just a myth.
Mnqobi: I don't understand, what made him come back? We both went to cleansing and he hasn't shown himself to me. Why is he coming for you now?
Konke: I don't know and when I woke up, I felt like something was watching me. I got so scared.
Mnqobi: It's all in your mind, try and forget about this. It's been 8 years.
Konke: You've been divorced for 8 months too and you're still not over it.
Mnqobi: It's not the same.
Konke: Yes, it's not! Mine is worse. Someone died.
Mnqobi: I know. I was there, remember?
Konke: Maybe I should just turn myself in.
I sigh. She always says this when she's feeling guilty about what happened.
Mnqobi: Why don't you go to therapy?
Konke: And say what? "Hey Mr Therapist I shot and killed someone 8 years ago."
Mnqobi: You know that's not what I meant.
Konke: I can't go to therapy.
Mnqobi: Why?
Konke: Because I don't want to!
She stands up and heads towards the door.
Mnqobi: Where are you going?
Konke: To shower. I need to go to work.
She gets out and leaves the door open. Why!? I still want to sleep, how am I going to sleep with the door open? I stand up and close it before getting back in bed.