Difficult choices
“So, my friend, have you checked on Simo?” Melissa asks a down looking Lee-Ann who sits at the veranda of this big and beautiful house in upper class suburbs. This house is situated near the lake. From where Lee-Ann is seated you can see swans sweeping carefree. Melissa who is a researcher lives with her brother who at the moment is away overseas on work. Their parents left them this house when they moved overseas. Melissa doesn’t have kids. Melissa had offered Lee-Ann, her best friend a place to stay since she didn’t want to go to her parents.“Eish my friend” Lee-Ann sighs deeply. “I just don’t want to rush things with him. I’ll give him the time that he needs and when he’s ready I suppose he will talk to me” she says with a sad face.
Melissa comes and sits next to her and gives her a back rub.
“You know, I’ve always liked Simo. I thought you guys were good together.” Melissa says. “But I know that you guys will sort whatever you are currently going through. I know you will” as she smiles at her friend. “So, work? You are really not going back to your dad’s company? You know that’s your inheritance babe, right?” Melissa says as she brushes Lee-Ann’s shoulder. “It’s not something you can just brush away you know. Doesn’t matter how you feel about your folks at the moment, but if your company does well, then it’s good for your retirement plans, hahaha” she bursts out laughing but Lee-Ann just lets out a little smile without showing much excitement over it.
“I know Mel, right?” Lee-Ann says as she looks up to the sky. “It’s just…” she poses for a second as if she’s trying to find better words. “I’m just trying to curve a way for my own path babe. Been living in my shadows, doing what he wants but now I want to find my own way so that when I have make certain decisions about my life I won’t feel pressured you know” she says and Melissa just nods to show that she understands.
“Besides, I just need sometime out to think and clear my head a little bit. I’ve been so emotionally drained since that day at my parents' anniversary party couple of months ago” she becomes sad but her friend gives her another back rub. A moment of silence passes and Lee-Ann looks at Melissa with some curiosity, “Wait, why are you asking me about work” she asks. “OMG, are you tired of me already?” asks jokingly as she puts her hands on the mouth but that just sends Melissa burst out laughing, “Hahaha, no silly. Are you kidding me?” she gives her a shoulder charge. “No man. I love having you here. It’s been the best of time really. The place was quite with Jason overseas” she says as she begins to look sad.
“Yeah and I’m glad he wasn’t here because I’d have felt restricted not being able to walk around the house half baked, hahaha” she bursts out laughing. “Girl oh please. Jason would have loved to see your sexy *** walking around hahaha” Melissa jokes much to Lee-Ann’s shock. “No ways” she says but Melissa laughs even the louder. “You know he really likes you hey” she says much to Lee-Ann’s amusement as she bursts out laughing. She can’t believe what Melissa has just said. “Your brother? Jason? He likes me? Hahaha. Did you pimp me out to your brother Melissa Hunter? Hahaha” she laughs loud.
“Of course not” Melissa says as she gives a tongue out naughty look. “Jason has always liked you, from since we became friends and he’s always fancied his chances” she smiles but this gets Lee-Ann to think for a second. “Well too bad for your brother my friend. I am taken” they laugh about it. “but on a serious note my friend” Lee-Ann’s face change. “Thank you for letting me stay with you while I figure things out. You are a true friend” she says as she gives Melissa a hug.
After they break the hug Melissa goes inside and after a moment she comes back with a bottle of wine and glasses, much to Lee-Ann’s amazement. She pours for both of them, “Look I don’t care if it’s 10:00 AM. It’s a weekend and we shall enjoy our youth” they both laugh while they toast to that.
***
At the Smart house things haven’t been great. Stacey and Ben feel like they are losing their daughter Julie, who is drifting far and far away from them. They don’t know how to contain the situation because she doesn’t really talk to them that much. If anything, she’s always locked in her room.
“Son, how is your sister? We are really worried about her” Ben asks David who is busy on his phone while his folks are watching TV. He puts the phone down for a second, “uhmm, she’s not coping really well dad. She’s struggling. There’s just too much she has to deal with you know?” his voice turns sad as he says. But Stacey switches of the TV so that they can pay attention to their son. “But Ben, why can’t your sister talk to us? I mean we are her parents. Why can’t she tell us what’s going on?” asks Stacey with a trembling voice. But David is trying to find words, “Look mom, when she’s ready I’m sure she will come to you guys. Just give her time okay?” he pleads.
“And how is the baby?” Stacey asks with a concerned voice. At that David gives a sigh, which kind of gives his folks a panic and he sees that. “The baby is okay mom” he says. “I just think she’s just worried about Mlu. She doesn’t want to deny him an opportunity to….” He doesn’t finishes as Ben cuts him off sharply, “Oh what the hell” he shouts. “Why must she give that boy any opportunity to do anything huh? This is all his fault. Our daughter is going through all this because of him. Julie needs us, her family. Not that boy and…”
David also cuts in, “Daddy, daddy please stop okay?” he says politely. “This isn’t Mlu's fault okay, none of it is” he says much to his parents’ amazement. “If anything, my sister is the one who is at fault. She accused the guy of rape and blackmailed his friend who as a result got into an accident where he almost died” his voice is only rising. But his parents didn’t expect that David will say all this. As a person who spends most of his time with Julie, they expected that he’d defend her.
“How can you defend this man after what he did to your sister David? Shouldn’t you be on your sister’s side? Instead…Stacey says but she’s also cut off by her son, “I am not defending Mlu Mom” he says calmly. “I am on my sister’s side okay? I have indicated that I will support every decision she takes around this this baby” he says and his parents look loss of words.
“This pregnancy has changed my sister. She looks at things differently now. And she really wants to make amends for any wrongs she may have caused anyone and I’m fully behind her in that. So if she wants Mlu to be part of her baby, then I support her on that” he says as he stands up to walk out the room as his mom calls out on him, “David, have you forgotten what happened to me? What those people did to your father? He could have died you know”
But David is becoming really annoyed with his folks and he can’t take it anymore, “mama, I haven’t forgotten what you and dad went through okay?” he shouts. “No one in this family has forgotten that. It was terrifying experience for everyone. But Mlu didn’t hijack you ma and dad Mlu didn’t shoot you, okay?” but as Stacey attempts to protest but David doesn’t allow her as he motions by his hands, “No mama, no” he shouts.
“This is exactly the rage that led to my sister accusing a man of rape which could have destroyed his career and almost sent a man to his death. And on top of that sending her own cousin to depression” his voice was going higher as he throws his hands in the air. “mama, taking out your rage and anger on the wrong people won’t turn back the clock. Must all black people who have been wronged by whites come here and knock this door down, seeking revenge for their loved ones? Huh? Is that what you really want mom? Dad? Because then we aren’t different from all those people who were also wronged. Mlu has nothing to do with what happened to you guys”
All the while his parents are listening in shock or awe. They’ve never seen their David like this before. But he is not done, “Look, I’m just happy that Julie hasn’t seen what her misplaced rage has caused, how it has caused uncle Morgan and aunt Debra to lose their daughter. And by the look of things they will lose Derby too. Now is that what you want to happen with Julie too, mom?” now he has tears in his eyes. “Because I can guarantee you, it’s not only your daughter that you will lose but your son too. I will support Julie on this pregnancy and I have made a promise that I will love this baby and will be the best uncle in the whole world. Now if I have to go search for Mlu and try to reason with him over this, and beg Jim to be part of this baby, then that is exactly what I will do, mom and dad” he concludes by breathing a huge sigh as if a huge burden has been lifted from his shoulders.
He then leaves his parents in the lounge, speechless and in shock.
They watch as their son climbs the stairs. At that Ben stands up, without saying a word he heads to his room but his wife calls on him, “Ben, darling, aren’t you going to say anything about this, anything at all?” Stacey says as she points to her son who is climbing the stairs. But Ben turns around and comes back to sit down.
“Darling, what exactly do you want me to say, huh?” he says calmly, or he’s still in shock. “You heard him. And to be honest my love, David has a point. This rage over a wrong person won’t help. It won’t change the past” as he tries to avoid eye contact. “The last thing I want lose my children, especially over misplaced rage and anger. That’s exactly what has happened to your sister, Debra and…”
Ben doesn’t finish as Stacey cuts him of, “Oh please I don’t ask you to repeat what your son just said, okay? I am…” but she doesn’t finish also as Ben cuts her off, “No darling wait” he says. “I’m not saying I like this boy okay. I don’t know him. I don’t know what’s the deal with him and my daughter but he is the father of my grandchild and if Julie wants him to be part of this then I can’t stand in the way of that now can i?” he shouts in frustration.
But at hearing that Stacey stands up and walks out of the room, leaving Ben standing alone in the lounge. He waits for her to climb the stairs and then he goes upstairs to knock at his son, David’s room. He lets him in so that they could talk.
***
Mlu is at the Mall. He was doing a little retail therapy for himself. Just like everyone who’s bought themselves something new, he’s so excited over what he’s bought. He can’t wait for Monday where he rocks up his new sneakers and new pair of jeans. This is what he really needed in his life at this present moment. But clearly with all this day dreaming, he wasn’t watching where he was going as he bumps onto a person and drops one of his shopping bags on the floor. “I’m sorry” he says as he picks it up. But as he straightens up, he isn’t ready for what his eyes meet. It’s Julie. She’s standing right there so close to him they are just separated by almost nothing.
He has frozen in shock. He was caught off guard. But he can’t take her eyes of her. Julie herself is looking at him and not moving her eyes away. He doesn’t know what to do, let alone how to feel.
There’s a moment of awkward silence. To both of them it feels like the Earth stood still. But without moment’s notice, he snaps out of it. Suddenly his facial expressions change as he turns around to go the other direction. But Julie holds his hands, “Please Mlu” she says. Please don’t go. Please I beg you” with a trembling voice. Mlu turns around and looks at her. What he sees in her eyes tells many different stories.
Her eyes look like terrified to the bone, but they are also filled with regrets. But at the same time they are also filled with love, which is confusing the disoriented Mlu. He looks at the hand that holds him, to which Julie lets go. There’s a few seconds awkwardness. “Please don’t go. I need to talk to you about something important” Julie says with a trembling voice. “Can we please go somewhere, where we can talk? Please Mlu” she says to a Mlu whose eyes are filled with rage and regrets. He doesn’t respond but he remembers what Lee- Ann had said about Julie having something to tell him.
They are standing next to a coffee shop. Mlu looks at it and sighs heavily. “Okay. Five minutes” he says as he indicates with his head that there’s a coffee shop next to them. “Julie nods nervously as she smiles with excitement. They enter the coffee shop which isn’t really full. It’s still early on a Saturday. They are led by a waiter who takes them to a corner somewhere.
“Thank you for giving me your time” Julie says nervously as they sit down. “I know that…I know that…” she’s struggling for words, “I know that I’m the last person you want to talk to but I thought that maybe…” Julie doesn’t finish as Mlu cuts her off, “Why?” he says. “Why Julie? Why did you do it? Why did you choose me?” he’s trying to not shout since there are a few people in this place. He looks around to see if anyone is listening to them but everyone here is minding their own business. Julie looks down in shame, her eyes are red. She looks at Mlu and sees that his eyes are burning with rage. A tear falls down. She wipes it. But Mlu is unmoved. He is just waiting for the answer.
“I’m really sorry Mlu” Julie says with a trembling voice. “I know that you may not believe me but I’m really sorry and I wish I could turn back the clock but…” as she says that Mlu cuts her of as he bangs his hands on the table, “I didn’t ask for your apology demit. I asked why did you do it” he whispers as he looks around.
But before Julie could answer they are interrupted by the waiter who comes to them. “Good morning, can I please take your orders” the waiter says with a smile. Mlu and Julie look at each other as if they weren’t ready. This waiter's timing is bad. Or it’s perfect, things were getting warm in there. “Uhmm just coffee please” Julie says with a nervous smile as she looks at Mlu, who smiles back at the waiter as he says “Yeah please make that two” to that waiter writes down and goes away. Well it seems that ceasefire was really short lived as tension builds as soon as the waiter leaves.
They are looking at each other in the eyes. There’s awkward silence there for a minute. Julie is looking for words but she’s really struggling to put them together. Another tear falls down. She wipes it fast as she looks around to see if someone is watching. She doesn’t want people getting the wrong idea.
“Uhmm, I know what I did to you was wrong Mlu” Julie says as she gives a huge sigh, much to Mlu's annoyance. “I was angry, thirsty for revenge and just wanted…” but Mlu cuts her off again, “Revenge for what Julie?” he asks with a puzzled face. “Revenge for what? What did I ever do to you? Huh? I didn’t date your cousin, so why me? I don’t understand any of this. It makes no sense at all Julie. Do you just go around accusing people of rape?” He raises his voice a bit but clearly not enough to get people’s attention in this place.
But before Julie could respond to that, a waiter interrupts them again as she brings them their order. “Thank you” they both say simultaneously as the waiter walks away.
“I know” Julie says as she looks down in shame. “I regret everything I did to you, to Simo and to my cousin. I thought I was protecting her and wanted to do what’s right for her and…” but at hearing that, Mlu doesn’t wait for her to finish. He stands up and takes out his wallet wanting to pay but then Julie shocks him to the bone, “I’m pregnant” she shouts.
That eventually gets the attention of one table as Mlu looks around. He immediately sits down to avoid more eyes on them. He’s still lost for words, in shock even. There it is that awkward moment again.
Julie’s eyes are red. She’s trying to read what Mlu is thinking but all he could say is, “what?” softly. Julie looks around nervously, “Look before you ask, no I haven’t been with anyone else since you” she says. “In fact since the first time I slept with you I haven’t slept with anyone else” she says to a still shocked Mlu. He clears his throat, “Are you sure?” he says, much to Julie’s shock. But Mlu continues, “No I meant that are you sure you’re pregnant?” he asks nervously.
“Yes, Mlu I’m sure. Come on I’m sure you can see a little difference” Julie says with a nervous smile. She’s still waiting to see Mlu's reaction to all of this before she can know if being excited is okay but she’s struggling to read Mlu’s face. He is very shocked in a good or bad way. He’s struggling to put words together at this point as he holds his head.
“Look, tomorrow I’m going for scan with my brother, but if you want to come along I wouldn’t mind” Julie says nervously. “Look. I can’t tell you what to do okay. You may not want this baby because I have caused you pain and I can understand that. But I just wanted to let you know that I’m keeping the baby and I will…” she gets cut off by Mlu, “Why do you want me to come tomorrow Julie?” he asks. “I mean, what exactly do you want from me? You first press charges of rape against me where my life could have been over and destroyed, because you were angry at a black man. Now you want me to be part of this pregnancy? What’s really going on Julie?” he asks like a person who is very confused.
“Because you are the father, Mlu” Julie responds as she touches her tummy. “It wouldn’t be fair if I shut you out of your child’s life. I’m not asking that you and I be an item or anything like that. I just wanted to afford you a chance to make your own choice on this okay? I thought after what I put you through you at least deserved to know this. But like I said, whatever you decide it’s okay. But I’m going to keep this baby” she concludes as she tries to hold the tears from falling. Mlu stands up and takes out a few notes from his wallet and put them down. “I’m sorry Julie” he says. “But this is a lot to take in okay. I just need a moment to process all of this” as he takes his shopping bags, leaving Julie sitting there by herself.
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