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BABY DADDY DRAMA

CHAPTER 3

KAONE

Driving home has never felt this long. I can't wait to make sure that my son is safe, hold him in my arms and assure him that no one will hurt him. I finally get home and my heart is put at ease when I see him playing outside. He runs towards my car and jumps up and down in excitement. I pull him into a tight hug and kiss his soft cheeks. His clothes smell like fabric softener, I will forever be grateful to mama for raising my child so well. I'm indebted to her.

"Are you okay nana?" I take a thorough look at him.

"Yes I'm fine mama. I didn't know you're coming," he says.

"I missed you and I wanted it to be a surprise. Look how big you've got. I feel like I haven't seen you in a very long time."

"What did you bring for me?" He touches my bag. Damn, I was supposed to get something for him but after my encounter with Pitso, it all slipped my mind and I needed to get home fast.

"I didn't get you anything nana but I promise tomorrow I'll get you something. It's my day off so we'll have all day to ourselves and you can get whatever you want."

"Kaone! I thought I heard your voice," my mother comes out of the house. I notice she's limping.

"Mama what happened?"

"It's nothing I'll be fine," she says.

"No mama it might be serious. Let me take a look," Odirile holds my bag as we go into the house.

"It's nothing, really. I fell while chasing your son."

"Chasing him? Why would you chase him?"

"Grandma wanted to wring my ear because I didn't wash my socks after school," he says.

"How many times must I tell you to listen to grandma and grandpa? Do you want me to confiscate your gaming console?"

"No mama. I'm sorry, I washed them all yesterday."

"I'll be fine, Kaone. You didn't tell me you're coming home."

"Baby please go put my bag in my bedroom," he leaves.

"Pitso is back, mama," I say.

"Pitso? Odirile's father?"

"Odirile doesn't have a father. Don't even mention that."

"After so long? What does he want?"

"Obviously he wants Odi."

"He'll have to kill me first before he can get anywhere near my grandson. I will never forgive him after the humiliation he put us through by denying Odirile. He called you loose and all sorts of names. He has another thing coming if he things we'll let him see him," says mom.

"Can you believe he was stalking me, mama. For the past few days I thought I was losing my mind. He was following me, he's a psycho."

"You need to go get a restraining order against him. If he bothers you again he'll be behind bars."

****

GASH

I wake up sweating, my vest soaked. The nightmares are getting more and more intense every night. I switch on my light and drink a glass of water that was on my bedside. I'm dying inside because I fail to talk about how I feel. I even broke up with the mother of my child because of my behavior.

I open my phone gallery and go through my son's photos. He was a happy child, forever laughing. I put my priorities aside each weekend and made sure to spend some hours with him. We got along more than he got along with his mother.

I took a dose of unprescribed sleeping pills before I went to bed but they don't seem to be working. I take another dose and down it with the glass of water. How does a man perceived powerful like myself drown in so much misery. How do I even begin to open up to someone and tell them that I cry every night before I sleep? That I sometimes sit down in a shower and just get lost in my thoughts for hours. That I once got addicted to alcohol and drugs because I couldn't handle my reality?

I will come out as weak if anyone was to find all these things. I lie down and stare at the ceiling hoping I'll fall asleep again.

****

PITSO

It's a Monday at around 13:00. I'm waiting outside the school for my son. It's not far from where he lives so no one comes to pick him up, he walks by himself. After looking at his photos posted on Kaone's social media, it won't be hard to spot him, he's my copy.

After a couple of minutes, he comes out with his friends. Unlike any other kid after school, my child is neat. It's as if he's going to school and not coming back. I follow him until he's distant from the school and approach him.

"Odirile," I call him. He stops and turns, looking at me with confusion.

"My name is Pitso. Do know me?"

He shakes his head no. I'm overwhelmed with regret for not being in his life for all these years.

"Can I talk to you?"

"No! My grandma said to never talk to strangers," he says.

"She taught you well but I'm no stranger, I'm your father."

He shakes his head once more.

"No! My father is dead, my mom told me," he says.

"She lied. I'm your father, Pitso. Your mother lied to you because of our differences. Please, don't run away," I try to touch him but he flees. His friends run too, thinking I'm some kind of a thug. I might have ruined my chances of getting to know him because right now he's definitely going to this grandma about me.

"It's okay, Pitso. You'll get another chance," I say to myself as I watch him disappear.

I get into my car and drive off. I will do whatever it takes to be with my son, whatever it takes.